There is an apropos article about a Minnesota woman who sent out a text message to all of her contacts wishing them a happy new year. The problem was that her ex boyfriend received the message as well, this was problematic as her ex had a restraining order filed against her. The next day she was notified by the police that she was in violation of her restraining order and placed in jail. To most people this seems quite harsh, but as I have detailed on previous blogs, that if you don’t follow the rules exactly laid out by the judge regarding your restraining order, you will end up on the wrong side of the law as this poor woman found out.

http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-504083_162-57352161-504083/mass-happy-new-year-text-lands-minnesota-woman-in-jail/

For more information on how to protect ypourself against a restraining order go to restraining order 911.

Many people seem to be confused about the differences between restraining orders and protective orders and this article is an attempt to clear the air about these misconceptions. Many people might be aware of these laws but are unaware of its powers, functions and responsibilities. They want to know how it works and what happens when someone breaks a restraining order or violates it. Some of the most common misconceptions about these terms will be cleared here.

 The Purpose of a Restraining Order

The very first misconception, which is famous among the general public, is about its purpose. People just do not know what is the purpose of a restraining order? There is a concept that a restraining order is actually a punishment order, but, the fact is, it is a preventive order. Whenever a person takes a restraining order against someone, it prevents that person to commit specific actions against this person. It also states the results and consequences if someone were to not obey this order.

 What is a Protective Order?

Many people often mix restraining orders with protective orders. A protective order is a special order which is issued against a member or members of the same family. The courts generally issue this order to tackle child and spousal abuse. Restraining orders however, are issued mostly in divorce cases. Many lawyers have become savvy in using restraining orders during the divorce process as it enables the lawyers to extract more money out of the parties during this process. Restraining orders can also be used to prohibit the other party from selling combined property, depleting bank accounts and running up credit card bills.

If the person who is served the restraining or protective order violates this order, he may end up behind bars for a specific time period. In many cases, the courts have also imposed heavy fines on people for violating these orders. The main purpose of these orders is to prevent crimes from happening. The biggest deficiencies of these orders is the low hurdle of proof required to get a restraining order or protective order issued against someone and because of this, there has been numerous instance where  serious abuses have occurred; so it is very important to follow the letter of the law when confronted with either one of these orders.

Today it is very easy to get a restraining order, not like it was a few years back. Because of this we have seen more innocent people suffer as the judges do not need a lot of evidence to impose one.

How Restraining Orders Are Now Used

Restraining orders have been used as a tool to get revenge on one’s spouse which is really not the right way to handle anger issues. In many instances restraining orders are now used when one spouse wants to have an upper hand when the divorce proceedings are taking place. I understand that there are true victims of domestic violence and they have a right to being protected from the abuse. But  I know first hand many people out who have been victims of restraining orders, what was initially intended to protect abuse victims- has now been turned into a weapon by many divorce attorney’s .

Restraining Orders and the Abuses

Lawyers and divorce attorneys have taken advantage of these laws. In many cases the victim of a false restraining order is left homeless with his/ her property in the hands of the accuser and with no access to the children. This is very traumatizing emotionally, physically and financially. The person who has been victimized by the restraining order now has to prove that they are innocent which takes a lot of effort in court battles and finances too. Children too suffer as they are confused with the state of events that has led this severe fracture within the family.

Those who find themselves on the receiving end of restraining order abuse find there lives very difficult. There names are tarnished, and have limited access to face their accuser to try sort things out or even spend time with their children. It is very sad that what the State meant for protecting the victims of domestic abuse has been turned around and there are people who are using it as a way of revenge in the divorce process. There are many men and women who have suffered wrongfully in the hands of scrupulous divorce attorneys. This should be stopped but the question is how. How can restraining orders be carried out in a way that no one suffers or misuses the law?

Restraining Orders are mainly issued because there is a prevailing misconception that men are innately prone to victimizing women, as opposed to the other way around, was started in 1993 and has gained momentum ever since. The concept is known as the Super Bowl Hoax, as assertions claimed that more women were victimized on Super Bowl Sunday than at any other time of the year.

Restraining Orders usually only target men

A “Good Morning America” appearance from Lenore Walker reinforced this mindset. Walker is the author of “The Battered Woman,” a read that is largely responsible for “battered woman syndrome.” This is the belief that abusers are always men and that their victims are always women. This assertion assumes this to be true of all men, denying the possibility that men can be victims as well. The claim was later disproved by a scholar named Christina Hoff Sommers.

But the event ultimately instigated the Violence Against Women Act (VAWA), which is now suspected to be more harmful than beneficial except primarily by left-wing feminists. These women push feminist ideology over pro-family ideals, denying methods that might help such as anti-substance-abuse counseling.

These issues and the aftermath of domestic violence ultimately costs billions of dollars annually. When a woman accuses her male partner of abuse, her word is often taken as truth. This can result in a violation of constitutional rights for the man as his side of the story is often undermined due to a preconceived notion. These families often break up and about 20 billion dollars of taxpayer money is shelled out every year to support the single-parent homes that are left over.

Right now tax payers pay an average of 100 million dollars each year to fatherless families who depend on welfare. A preferable alternative would be to pro-family solutions that help victims of domestic abuse overcome their problems. Not only would this save the government money to be better used elsewhere, it would also save thousands of families from fragmenting and struggling for a living. Stop Abusive and Violent Environments (SAVE) is an organization who is taking action to begin this process. Already they have developed numerous and less expensive solutions.

Right now the assumption that the woman is always the victim gives her the benefit of the doubt. With no accountability, there are many who take advantage of the system with the help of this preconceived notion. Some solutions to the problem include requiring proof of abuse in order to identify the true victims. This will help make good use of the monies budgeted to help these individuals.

SAVE Hopes To Help the Amount of Restraining Orders That Get Issued

SAVE has already begun improvements by instigating a program that suspends funds from programs that lack accreditation and legitimacy. This will help decrease the federal deficit as well as provide more help to the true victims of domestic violence abuse. In turn this should minimize the amount of restraining orders that get issued.